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Top of the Key: The Sixers are Going to be Abysmal Next Year – and That’s a Good Thing

Dave Hartley – bassist for The War on Drugs, mastermind of Nightlands, and all-around hoops enthusiast – weighs in on the basketball scene for us periodically in his Top of the Key column. This week, Dave presents an analysis of why the Sixers’ 2014 roster is not unlike the Fleetwood Mac album Penguin.

Capsule:
1. The 76ers have a new GM and a new CEO, both of whom are fully onboard with advanced metrics and Moneyball-style statistical analysis
2. We traded our only All-Star for the most talented player in the draft (who is recovering from a torn ACL) and a 2014 draft pick (this is big)
3. We’re going to lose a ton of games next year, which should get us an additional high draft pick in 2014
4. Experts are calling the 2014 draft the best in decades

Conclusion:
We’re going to have boat loads of young talent and a ton of cap-space to potentially lure a big name free agent

Metaphors:
1. To get your basement really clean, you generally have to make a giant mess first, pull out those old boxes, dig through that pile of trash, sweep the cat litter into a big pile, stir up tons of dust
2. To fix that nagging wrist injury sometimes you have to re-break the bone and set it properly
3. Fleetwood Mac had to get worse after the departure of Peter Green (the Kirwin, Spencer, Welsch, Weston years, etc.) before they got better (eponymous, Rumours, Tusk, Mirage, etc.)
4. The Sixers are about to release their Penguin Continue reading →